God rid me of myself

At life group tonight I heard a story told that hit close to my heart so in hopes that it will benefit others I thought I will share...

It was amazing to know that I am not alone in my shame of decisions and paths I have chosen to follow. Sometime that feeling can consume a person to the point of saying "God rid me of myself", if you love me so much fix me or take me because I am incapable of doing what I should.

The story...

A mother was camping with her family when her 14 month old fell and hit her mouth causing an injury needing immediate medical attention. She described her child’s response as crying and distress to the events and the treatment. She was restrained and being tended to by nurses and doctors screaming and crying she was fixated on her mother. Her eyes and tears were saying to her mother, why are you not doing something, why are you letting me go through this, why won’t you stop what’s happening.

Her mother knew what the whole picture was and knew the outcome was what her daughter needed, healing and growth.

She explained, years later she realized that is what our dialogue is with God. We are struggling and begging for Him to do something. Fix it, Stop it, and Why are You not doing something? All the while He is saying "I know what the outcome is, It will result in healing and growth, keep your eyes on me, trust in Me and you will be alright."

Easier said than done but it is a starting point.

Thank you friend for sharing, God wanted you to tell me that, I was prayed for to be at life group tonight and I will not forget the wisdom you shared with that story...

One thing remains, I am confident in His character

I believe in God because I know that there is only one thing that is constant and never failing is His love for me.

If this earth and these things were all there is to living then what a sad life it will be to not strive for something greater than just what we can touch and see. Especially for those of us who have been dealt a crappy hand of cards.

I believe not because of what people tell me to believe but because I know the longing in my heart that I cannot describe, that only has a touch of satisfaction when I feel close to Him whether being obedient or just thinking of Him.

I am not perfect and nor will I ever claim to be, but I know that His love will never fail me. I make mistakes that disappoint Him and I am so sorry for that. I know He wants me to do more and knows what I am capable of doing.

God is not church! God is in the hearts of those who show His love to others. His love will never fail; He will never give up on me or you… Everyone else on earth, family, and friends loved ones will let you down they are human and we will forever be flawed.

I promise because I know it to be true, I feel it in the inmost part of my heart.

When I pray for you I pray with the power that God has promised me. Science is not the answer to love from God and the two concepts are like water and oil. I pray trusting that God knows what is best (whatever that is)… And if you try to see past the science that others have used to cloud your heart you may find yourself talking to Him and he will listen. You can plea to Him boldly and passionately, your wrongs he can make right… those pieces that took years to scatter he will help you pick them up one at a time and He will do it not judging you.

May I remind you I am not perfect, I make mistakes and I am not a good example of a good person at all but I know that He loves me just the way I am. I don’t have to hide from Him even though I am ashamed He already knows what I’ve done.

So I pray that if I continue to show you kindness and love in return you will see that it is God who gave it to me to share.

In the Bible it states that “He has started a good work in me and He will follow it through until completion” Phil 1:6

I laugh sometimes thinking…..man He has a lot of work to do in me…but He is the man for the task and I believe He can do it….as long as I let him.