God rid me of myself

At life group tonight I heard a story told that hit close to my heart so in hopes that it will benefit others I thought I will share...

It was amazing to know that I am not alone in my shame of decisions and paths I have chosen to follow. Sometime that feeling can consume a person to the point of saying "God rid me of myself", if you love me so much fix me or take me because I am incapable of doing what I should.

The story...

A mother was camping with her family when her 14 month old fell and hit her mouth causing an injury needing immediate medical attention. She described her child’s response as crying and distress to the events and the treatment. She was restrained and being tended to by nurses and doctors screaming and crying she was fixated on her mother. Her eyes and tears were saying to her mother, why are you not doing something, why are you letting me go through this, why won’t you stop what’s happening.

Her mother knew what the whole picture was and knew the outcome was what her daughter needed, healing and growth.

She explained, years later she realized that is what our dialogue is with God. We are struggling and begging for Him to do something. Fix it, Stop it, and Why are You not doing something? All the while He is saying "I know what the outcome is, It will result in healing and growth, keep your eyes on me, trust in Me and you will be alright."

Easier said than done but it is a starting point.

Thank you friend for sharing, God wanted you to tell me that, I was prayed for to be at life group tonight and I will not forget the wisdom you shared with that story...

One thing remains, I am confident in His character

I believe in God because I know that there is only one thing that is constant and never failing is His love for me.

If this earth and these things were all there is to living then what a sad life it will be to not strive for something greater than just what we can touch and see. Especially for those of us who have been dealt a crappy hand of cards.

I believe not because of what people tell me to believe but because I know the longing in my heart that I cannot describe, that only has a touch of satisfaction when I feel close to Him whether being obedient or just thinking of Him.

I am not perfect and nor will I ever claim to be, but I know that His love will never fail me. I make mistakes that disappoint Him and I am so sorry for that. I know He wants me to do more and knows what I am capable of doing.

God is not church! God is in the hearts of those who show His love to others. His love will never fail; He will never give up on me or you… Everyone else on earth, family, and friends loved ones will let you down they are human and we will forever be flawed.

I promise because I know it to be true, I feel it in the inmost part of my heart.

When I pray for you I pray with the power that God has promised me. Science is not the answer to love from God and the two concepts are like water and oil. I pray trusting that God knows what is best (whatever that is)… And if you try to see past the science that others have used to cloud your heart you may find yourself talking to Him and he will listen. You can plea to Him boldly and passionately, your wrongs he can make right… those pieces that took years to scatter he will help you pick them up one at a time and He will do it not judging you.

May I remind you I am not perfect, I make mistakes and I am not a good example of a good person at all but I know that He loves me just the way I am. I don’t have to hide from Him even though I am ashamed He already knows what I’ve done.

So I pray that if I continue to show you kindness and love in return you will see that it is God who gave it to me to share.

In the Bible it states that “He has started a good work in me and He will follow it through until completion” Phil 1:6

I laugh sometimes thinking…..man He has a lot of work to do in me…but He is the man for the task and I believe He can do it….as long as I let him.

Jesus Mad Libs

Had a major rationalization that I am my own worst enemy.

So many times we get caught up in our own feelings we allow it to limit us from our capabilities. We have fear, doubt, could have, wish I were, must be nice attitude….. It blinds us from the truth…Jesus Christ is enough for all of that. I repeat it for my benefit…Jesus Christ is enough!! Just as much as we beat ourselves with the same crap over and over again we need to repeat the truth…

Jesus meets any expectations that others can’t…

Just like in Mad Libs, you know… back in the day all you do is fill in the Blanks. Now use it with the name that represents truth….Jesus!!

Here is an example….

I look to _________to make me feel accepted and loved. When  ________ approval is all I seek I feel complete and valuable with a purpose. When I am reminded of my personal faults ___________ sees it all, and yet still loves me. Not only my personal flaws but my deep wrongs and mistakes and __________ forgives me.  Even when many others will let me down, ridicule me, not accept me, not like me, never see the hard work I do,  __________ always will.

I think I have just realized all this time I have been living a lie of doing for the acceptance of family, friends and other people in the community, always ending up empty. All that I am looking for is in Jesus Christ my savior and in Him I will find all that I am looking for in others. Anything that I have put in His place is a sin (Anything that separates us from God is a sin). When I fill the empty expectations and feelings up with Him I will find completeness.

My family doesn’t appreciate me…but Jesus does!

Work doesn’t see all my effort….but Jesus does!

What I want my spouse to be….Jesus is!

What I wish I was and try to be….Jesus loves the real me!

**You can create your own Mad Libs **

Father I pray to you pleading that when the day is long you continue to make me strong knowing that Jesus is enough. Instill that truth in my heart father and don’t let me forget. I try but will never make it since I put so many novelties in His place, Remove these expectations I have of others and of myself, I trust that your son, my savior is enough!

"my heart will sing no other name"

Living in God's Love

Romans 5:5 states that the love of God is poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He gave us. What this means is that when the Lord, in the form of the Holy Spirit, comes to dwell in our hearts through our faith (believing) in His son Jesus Christ, He brings love with Him,( 1John4:8) because God is love.

Let’s ask ourselves what are we doing with the love of God that has been given to us?

 Do we reject it because we don’t think we are worthy enough to be loved?

Do we believe God is like others who have hurt us?

Or do we receive his love by faith, believing that He is greater than our weakness and failures?

Allow the love God brought into your heart be a part of you and who you are. You cannot get away from yourself. You will be with you for the rest of your life. Have a relationship with yourself and ask God to be involved as well. It is important that we have peace with ourselves and accept the love God has for us into our hearts. Receive it, Believe it and enjoy living in the freedom of the love that is in you and the love God has for you.

Staying on Task

It is so convenient to get discouraged and worn thin with doing GODS WORK (so we think). Sometimes we get so busy doing God’s work we tend to forget to invite Him along with us. If that is the case then we are not doing His work but our own. If we are doing our own work then “yes” you will tire and wear thin.  The bible gives many examples of how our strength comes from God so therefore any work that is ordered by Him then you would assume He will give you the energy to do it.

Phil 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”

I don’t think it is the fact that we can’t do it or forget God is our rock and our strength I feel that as we get so busy doing we forget what it will take to get it done.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you.

Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do , work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord and not for man.

Phil 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Proverbs 3:5 Lean on, Trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.

And when we feel completely overwhelmed we are instructed to redirect our thinking…

Psalm 143:4- 5 My spirit grows faint within me; my heart within me is dismayed. I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hand has done.

So in other words if your swallowed by life and hanging on by a thread, fix your thoughts on the good things that God has done or provided if you can’t see what He is doing now.

You may not be where you want to be but aren’t you glad you’re not where you were before you had LIFE?

We must be Careful in how we WALK, Seek Wisdom from the Lord, and Be Alert to the Lord’s guidance and opportunities to allow Him to love others through us. (CWA)

WE are given a great task issued from our Father and any task He has given us, as long as HE is invited every step of the way will be successful. The task will be fruitful and your joy in doing it will be abundant. However, If He isn’t invited, if you are doing the work for men and not the Lord, if you grumble and not humble. The task will be worrisome and difficult for you to bear.

My Lord said to me.".I love you More"

As His love penetrates my heart I find my moments looking to His discretion and seeking His direction.

 I climb into the mountains seeking Gods creation desperately looking for His explanation in this beautiful tapestry yet longing for my father’s correction.

 What I see is only beauty and peace.

 I watch man and woman become one in unity, taking vows of Love; at that moment I am reminded of the Love that originally consumed me.

I am reminded of the death of my God who said He loved me MORE. My God said “I LOVE YOU MORE!!!”

As I look onto my Lords creation I see the wonder and Majesty of His splendor….

Then as I am reminded of my faults and ask for forgiveness He tells me “I Love you More”..my SAVIOR said “I Love you More” How could You possibly!! … I cry!!

 All my sins, all that I’ve done wrong!!

Those moments I tried but wasn’t strong ….

Once more I hear in His sigh as he picked me up, brushed off my knees my Father said “I love you More”

As he brushed off my knees he saw inside of me only the things He knew I could be.

Why?

Because all I see is what I am not, the battles I in my heart Jesus fought but in my human nature lost.

How great is the Lord our God!

I am not measured by my shortcomings and faults.

I can rise above all the negative statements, condemnation and plots.

When my Lord saw me He said in spite of me … “I love you More”

Not because I love Him BUT because HE loved me first His blood is what quenches my thirst.

It runs deep in my veins and His love is what grasps my desperate claims and breaks me from my chains…

My Father, my Lord and my God said “I love you more” and with that it is HE I adore…

I am in awe and in LOVE with my God....

long obedience

From my reading “RED MOON RISING” (Some are my own words, some not) But all AWESOME to share with others

The communication in my reading was in reference to Obedience to the Lord… as described in the text from the book (Red Moon Rising)“Long Obedience” is the process of being obedient. I have struggled with this particular area in my life because sometimes the waiting would seem as spiritual stagnation, a blah state, or dry spell; as some may call it. So as I gathered some clarity through reading, maybe it wasn’t a problem as I saw it but a time for me to dive deeper in my relationship with God by being obedient. Which leads me to why I wanted to share…

Hardened Heart
At the time we are not aware of the process but pleasure pain and sin harden our hearts or numb our hearts. Even though we are unaware God still sees this and cannot look away. “He loves us too much and has called us to too much to allow us to settle for less than full spiritual health” In Hebrews 12:10 it states that God “disciplines us for our good, that we may share in His holiness” God has to take our hardened heart and make it feel again. He uses all types of circumstances, scripture, books, situations and encounters. He may use pain either of grater loss or a simpler experience to wake up your heart. “But there can be no movement in our lives until we are confronted by our current state.”

Wrestling
Wrestling begins when one tries to make sense of this inner turmoil. We will search for words to describe these confused feelings. We will seek Gods answers by studying scripture, praying, reading books, and listening to worship music. With this we tend to debate on what it is that God wants us to do. “God is watching all this new activity with delight.” Yet God still says nothing.

Waiting
When God gives you the words for what has been bothering you and stirring in your heart. You have some understanding to what questions you have and can begin to speak clearer to God. The answers may not be evident but the questions are beginning to form. You have some direction to the original confused and hurting thoughts. Your dialog with God is developing and you are growing. You are waiting and watching for God to show.

Blessing
God steps in. He watched as you sought answers. He delighted as you prayed to Him and had conversations with Him. He was sowing seeds in your heart in order to soften it. Humble prayer on your knees, crying and questions is now that God steps in to bless you. He brings to your questions and wrestling clarity and light. You now look to Him in faith, in obedience and follow through.

Then you get to start the process over again.

“So I am waiting on God, and God is waiting on me to see if I am waiting for Him or wanting things from Him.”